This morning, the house was quiet by 7.45; with the boys already on their way to school and the Big Man still away with work, I had peace and quiet and the house to myself.

 

And rather than racing round doing household jobs before Wednesday Bootcamp , I totally indulged in 30 minutes of my book,  bathed in the bright autumnal sunlight..

 

One passage I highlighted and circled words… a passage about being ‘in flow’.  It was one of the best explanations I have read:

 

‘When time flies by in a split second; your whole self is completely engaged in the moment you feel deeply connected, whether to others, yourself, nature, the Universe at large;  opportunities present themselves effortlessly; and serendipity becomes the norm.’

 

For the first time in 3 weeks, I have felt my energy and my ‘flow’ returning.  My painful stomach cramps subsiding, my zest for life bubbling back to the surface and the smile returning to my eyes and not just my mouth.

 

And with that today was effortless, fun, enjoyable and serendipity was absolutely present, inspired thoughts turned to inspired action.

 

I was ‘in flow’ with the universe, my intentions, my life and my loves.

 

And the Big Man is home safely and snoring peacefully next to me…

 

Today I went to the back door and I was carrying 4 bags;  my handbag, the kids after school snack bag, my laptop bag and another bag with school prep in.  I was also carrying the car keys and the house keys, a bottle of water and flask of herbal tea.  As went to leave the house, I saw 2 boxes for the recycling so I picked those up and as they teetered on top of each other as I stepped out of the door, I realised I had no hands left to lock the door and turn on the alarm.

 

Historically, I would have tried to re-jig all my baggage, bottles and boxes and lock the door without putting anything down.

 

It would always end up in disaster… broken bottles, bag contents spillage and the words ‘bugger!’ followed by 10 minutes of clear up before finally getting out of the house.

 

Today, I took a breath, put down the boxes, turned on the alarm, picked up the boxes and walked away.  No chaos.  No breakdowns.  Just bish, bash, bosh.

 

It made me smile.  I have come a long way.

 

And it made me think about how I treat life and living too.   I have realised you can’t carry everything and everyone while doing what needs to be done all by yourself.  Sometimes you have to put stuff down.  You can always pick it up later… and by putting something down, you can move through and complete what does need to be done with far less stress, and then find that you can pick up what you left a lot quicker anyway!

 

 

 

 

 

There are moments every now and then that I reminisce and possibly slightly miss the excitement, the glamour, the anonymity, the busy-ness of London life.  And then I have a morning like this morning… the exact opposite!

 

As I walk in to a new ‘keep fit’ class in the village hall, thinking I won’t know anyone… I find I know pretty much everyone!   No anonymity here.  But I liked it.

 

The sound system and music wouldn’t work thanks to an ‘electrical problem’, so we grapevined to the beat of our feet… and the sound of the babies crying, or laughing when the instructor popped them on her hip.  No glamour here.  But I liked it.

 

A leisurely stroll in the sunshine to the village coffee bar, it was lovely to chat with a friend who has shared the experience of the loss of a mother and the emotional aftermath in the family.   It was lovely to discuss and debate the significant choice we have both made to put Motherhood and family environment first and leave our corporate careers, possibly due to the pscychology of loosing of our own mothers? No ‘busy-ness’ here.  But I liked it.

 

As I drove to pick up the boys from the excitement of the first proper away rugby match with school, I heard my audio book say ‘don’t let your good life take you away from your great life’… I took from that, that you can be comfortable in your own little world, but that comfort could be robbing you from an even better, bigger, brighter world.  And that just takes a pinch of courage – to step out and try new things, keep pushing the boundaries of goodness to create greatness.

 

WE had a good life in London, but we have made a great life in Yorkshire by making significant changes that we didn’t know would pay off.

 

But why stop there?

 

We have a great life in Yorkshire, but I am (we are…) not going to let that stop us from striving to live a a greater life, a bigger life, an extraordinary life.  Now that the Big Man and I have stretched our boundaries, it is almost like a drug…  the challenge, the adventure of the unknown exact destination is somewhat intoxicating, but only because we know where we are headed.  Just like we knew we were headed for Yorkshire, a family, a dog, a cat, we had no idea it would be our lovingly converted and renovated house, our family of 2 boys, Tom, Willy, Percy and Perdi…

 

Now there’s the excitement we had in London!

 

I am sat in my socks, drinking herbal tea and watching ‘the fockers’… Time to unwind from the long drive from the Beautiful South and to reflect on being part of a really special weekend to celebrate family and our nephew’s christening.

 

I love tradition.

 

I love family.

 

I love how a christening can join families with friends for a lifetime, connected through a willing obligation to be a role model in the life of child.

 

I love the poem read today in the service, one of my favourites and the words of which ring true for everyone, men but also women, boys as well as girls.

 

I love how the poem is a reminder of a set of morals and standards to live by, no matter how old or young you are.

 

 

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies,
Or being hated, don’t give way to hating,
And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream—and not make dreams your master;
If you can think—and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build ’em up with worn-out tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breathe a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: “Hold on!”

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with Kings—nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,
And—which is more—you’ll be a Man, my son.

 

by Rudyard Kipling

 

With the first Saturday off school, my typically polite, jolly young man was clearly showing signs of exhaustion. That… Or hormones…
We had to have words about his language, attitude and lack of respect.
As I asked him what I needed to do in order to gain his respect to ensure he never spoke to me again like that again, peering up through his blond curls and curly black eyelashes, despite being red from tears, his eyes still had a twinkle,
‘You could buy me a dirt bike, Mummy.’
Got to love him for his humour … 
Just got to love him…

The day started with laughter and has ended with a fire and a flood!  Sounds like something out of the bible….!

 

Our electronic alarm clock has been made redundant thanks to ‘bounce out of bed’ Tom.  Always the first to wriggle in between the Big Man and I, giving us little kisses… shortly followed like a stealth like Willy who creeps in to snuggle in to me… We all lie like that in a family huddle.. until …. the inevitable ….  A bed of 3 boys…    This morning’s outburst could have been the result from the  BFG’s ‘frobscottle’… a right ‘whizzpopper’.

 

And that was it, the bed shook with the laughter from all of us.    What a great way to start the day!  It kept the smile on my face throughout…

 

Until I forgot about the oil warming on the hob – totally distracted by my phone pinging (!) and turning round to see foot high orange flames dancing at me through black smoke.  With no regard to my  favourite tea towel, I threw it over the pan and did what every fireman would probably reprimand me for and grabbed it and ran out the back door and threw it in the flower bed.

 

AS I went back to open the windows to let out the smoke, I saw a steady flow of water coming down through the beams in the ceiling of the snug…..   I must work on my indepdence and practicality… I had no idea where the stop cock was..  Stop cock.  Just makes me laugh.

 

So I suppose I have ended the day with laughter too!

 

 

 

Today I had the most lovely conversation with a friend I haven’t spoken to in over 20 years.  In fact, I probably haven’t spoken to her or seen her since my last day of 6^th form.

 

There are people you meet in life who literally are sunshine.  She is one of those people;  from her golden blond hair to her infectious giggle that radiated down the phone line.

 

We reminisced about school and how lucky we were to have been born in to that school year and school.  Nicknamed by one of the school parents as the ‘iron ring’ as we were unbreakable, not just to separate but also to infiltrate, so strong our bond.  Of course, there were little groups of closer friends, but each group seemed to be linked, just like the rings of the Olympics;  connected, intertwined.  The academics, the sporty ones, the musical maestros, the artists and the social butterflies.  And yet regardless of grades or talents, it seems that everyone in our year has excelled; many medics, lawyers, leaders across industry, entrepreneurs to name a few.  All still gorgeous.  All still the same.  All still connected.

 

What made us such a special group?

 

As we asked this question of ourselves, the answer came to me.

 

I had just been listening to Richard Branson’s ‘Like a Virgin’.  Just a brilliant read as he shares his wisdom about leadership and entrepreneurship.  He reflected on the 4 P’s that they teach (and I was taught) in Business courses:  People, Product, Price, Promotion.

 

All fundamental, but in this day and age, retail is moving so fast that product, price and promotion are almost given, plus so easy to copy or duplicate.

 

People continue to be one of the most crucial factor in success in business;  or to take that further, I consider it to be personality.  Strength of character.  Integrity.  If you have those, then you have connections, loyalties, relationships… and a little ‘black book’.  All of that makes the person, priceless.

 

Add in Richard Branson’s addition to the 4P’s – Customer Service and Fun;  Fun with a capital F and to not take everything so seriously and there you have the magical formula for success.

 

And that is what I believe we all had:  Personality and fun.  Character and strong connections.  Despite our determination, our drive to win and perform our best on the lacrosse pitch, tennis court, rowing boat, on the stage, on paper… my memory is full of moments of laughter, giggling, and hilarity.  Who wouldn’t want to be around us, have us in their team or do business with us?!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I had a history lesson on the way home in the car this evening.   Both boys full of excitement from their days, full of adventure, activity and centuries apart.

 

Evacuee Willy was shipped off to learn about gas masks, bombs and WW2.

 

Viking Tom built a Viking ship, fashioned a real wooden shield and wove wool.

 

The facts flew out of their mouths, intertwining in the air, in between crunching apples and flying crisp crumbs.

 

The Germans invaded lots of countries.  Did you know that?

 

I drew my name in Viking.  Their ships were tied together with guts!

 

The German leader was a really nasty man… Hilter.. no Hitler.

 

If the dragon head is up, they are arriving to murder the men, steal the women and kidnap the children… and you had to run and hide

 

Hilter (!) shot himself.  In the neck.  He had done too many bad things.

 

If the dragon head is down, they come in peace and come to buy things.

 

Did you know WW2 started just 21 years after WW1 and they invaded Greece, France, Italy …. And not one German set foot on England – they just flew over and dropped bombs.

 

I can speak German, Willy – Nein, Nein, Nein!  And Erdbeer.  Kase.

 

I felt like I had had a history lesson for 45 minutes.

 

So it was definitely time for a ‘school break’ with milk and biscuits when we got home!

 

 

It’s 7pm and it’s dark!  I am amazed at how quickly the autumn nights are drawing in and how rapidly the temperature is dropping.

 

I am a big fan of the seasons, love the change and get excited just as much as red wine, heartwarming stews, scarves, knee high boots as I do summer rosé and cocktails, sun hats, bikinis and sun dresses…

 

I am also a big fan of small random acts of kindness.  Which I was reminded of today … because I was the un-expecting recipient of one today.

 

So along with various other small habits I have during the day, I am going to add a new one – one small act of kindness a day, every day.  Imagine if everyone did that.  Imagine the world if every one person did one small act to put a smile on one other person’s face a day…  Imagine if kids were taught that at school … Imagine.

 

I googled a few ideas… there are loads out there and they don’t have to cost anything or too much either.

• Leave change in the vending machine
• Leave a note on the bathroom mirror saying ‘you look amazing / hot / gorgeous.. today!’
• Smile at everyone you see
• Send flowers … for no real reason
• Write a note of thanks or encouragement to someone who inspires you …
• Pay for the coffee or drink for the person behind you in the queue
• Send a funny postcard in the post to make someone laugh who needs it
• Offer to babysit for a friend / relation who needs a day or night off
• Make cakes and take them round to all your neighbours
• Volunteer at your local charity and give your time for free..

And I am sure I will get more creative and think of more as the days go on..

 

When I googled, I found that there is a whole movement and groups of people called ‘RAKtivists’…

 

I am going to become one.  Just like my friend today, her ‘RAKtiveness’ made my day.

Time.  Probably the most precious of commodities these days.  If you are rich in time,  time to do what you want, whatever you want, I would consider that the true meaning of freedom and wealth.

In my 10 minutes of morning, daily calm, I focus on how grateful I am to have that 10 minutes of time to be calm, to let my mind empty.  

And today I am grateful for so much time I had doing things I love to do. 

I am grateful for the laughter round the round table with all the lovely school run Mum’s who came for a coffee, a cuppa, a croissant or clementine, chatting cricket, rugby, music lessons, local trivia… 

I am grateful for the lovely chat to a lovely friend, sharing stories and insights, discussing strategies and possibilities.

I am grateful for fun times in the car on the way home with 4 excitable boys, as always! 

I am grateful for the time to prepare healthy delicious meals for all my men and me…and for getting it on the table on time!

I am grateful for the time playing uno with the boys over tea time, giggling with Tom as we cheat to win!  Willy none the wiser… 

I am grateful for the time making it up to Willy, by reading with him and to him, to build his confidence.

I am grateful for time with the Big Man discussing his day and bouncing ideas and brainstorming; a little time, back in time doing powerpoint and presentations!

I am grateful for time with my team on the screens, wherever we are in the country, just to catch up and share success.

I am grateful now that it is time for bed and for more time tomorrow to do the same!!

I am going to bed feeling pretty happy and ‘wealthy’!  Happy days…