Tonight, after the long drive home to Yorkshire, at the end of a long day, after a long night looking after a poorly Willy, I am feeling beyond tired.
But the day has been peppered with little moments that have lit up my sad mood.
Finding the boys at the kitchen table in Grandad’s house, playing pick up sticks…. Just as I used to with Bambi over 30 years ago.
Seeing my Dad and Edna waving us goodbye, knowing they are so happy, in love, content and always there for us.
Arriving at my best friend and sister in law’s house, being bear hugged by my long legged, beautiful niece and seeing how happy the 4 cousins all disappeared to play.
Leaving knowing, I am not the only one is totally confused, disbelieving, feeling like it is all a dream.
Laughing out loud as I watch Willy dancing down the pedestrian streets of York with his day-glo Aperol freebie bobble hat and matching day-glo ‘gravity’ socks, shaking his boottie, hearing him giggle as he knows he is making me laugh.
Always my Tom Tom, coming up to me for no reason and wrapping his long arms around me and lifting his head for a kiss, saying ‘love you, mama’.
Arriving back home to a very welcome food package from a wonderful friend and neighbour left on our doorstop, with instructions to ‘bake’ and ‘enjoy!’.
Freezing fireworks and marshmallows on sticks, sticky in the fire, sticky on our chins.
And as I pick up my new book ‘the Secret Daily Teachings’, I find that today’s quote is rather apt for what I have written.