In the last 2 days, so much has happened; I have learnt so much, I have been broken and grown so much, I have danced so much my feet are raw, I have laughed until I almost peed my pants.

 

It’s only been 2 days since I saw the boys, but they all look different;  the Big Man more tanned than before, Willy blonder and more toothless, Tom taller and curlier…   the dog is even more annoying (in my usual love hate way with her) and the cat even more placid.

 

I have come home inspired for change.

 

After the turbulence of the first 6 months of this year and the calm, self healing, self indulgent last 2 months, I am ready. I am steady.  My foundations rebuilt and firm.

 

I have come home with my head so filled with reignited dreams, that no amount of crazy kids, a tired Big Man, piles of laundry, unpacked bags, dirty paws prints all over the kitchen floor, empty fridge and unmade beds can dull them.

 

So maybe this is another turning point in my story.

 

The quote that resonated with me today and keeps playing over and over in my mind is that you cannot die with your music inside you – whatever your ‘music’ may be.  As Les Brown says, how would you feel as you lay on your death bed with the ghosts of your dreams around you?

 

How would I feel if I let my dreams die with me?  Time is precious. Life is short.

 

My dream to have a family with husband and children is alive.  They are my daily purpose for living.

 

But I cannot die without writing a book, publishing a book and letting my ‘music’ out.  So I commit to keep following that dream and taking steps to make it happen, daily.

 

And I cannot die without helping others and making sure they don’t die with their music inside them.  Whether that be through the words I write or offering them a way, the time or the income that gives them the courage or means to pursue their purpose.  The same way that I was offered and chose to open and embrace.

 

I gave life to my dream of a family.  I will give life to all my dreams.  That is my purpose.