Searching for oysters

I love hearing people speak about their experiences, paying it forward by sharing their findings and learnings whether that be on TED talks, You Tube, Soundcloud and always when I am lucky enough, in person.


I have been privileged to be a friend who has mentored me and advised me in the ‘thought’ process and whose personal development journey and growth I have followed in the footsteps of.  Although not on the same path directly, I have been inspired by her commitment to becoming a better version of herself, and that has made me want to continually improve myself, recognise and be aware of where I need to improve, what I need to work on.


And interestingly, it always comes back to the mind and your thoughts.  Today she shared this phrase by Lao Tzu, which I love and remind myself of daily:


‘Watch your thoughts,

for they become words;

Watch your words,

For they become actions;

Watch your actions,

For they become habits;

Watch your habits,

For they become your character;

Watch your character,

For it becomes your destiny.’


It all ties in to the same ‘Secret’ teachings of thinking positive thoughts and Robin Sharma’s mental gardening with consistent fertilising of the mind of good things and weeding out the harmful negative self talk.


And yet while I am here on my rocky bed at the bottom of the ocean, it takes huge effort, daily focus to mind my mind, acknowledge the dark thoughts and search for the light and loving ones. The sun and the clouds.  And sometimes, all of the sudden, the clouds are so dark, the pressure of atmosphere so intense, the weight of the volume of the sea above me crushing my chest.


But I am letting it.


There are times to acknowledge the unhelpful negative thoughts, recognise them as the ego protecting you from what you fear and letting them go, enabling you to move forward towards your destiny.


But there are also times, that I also believe when the sad thoughts, heavy thoughts should be given the time to be acknowledged in a different way, not to let go but to allow them in, allow the intensity of them trigger emotions, so that you can feel the unhappiness and more importantly, the pain.  To run from pain, means that you will always be running, until they either catch you or eventually you will end up exhausted and but you won’t have the strength to face them, so they consume you.  To turn and face the pain, the intense emotions brought about by negative thoughts takes courage.  And as Glennon Doyle Melton so eloquently advises – you have to look in to the pain in order to find the jewels that give you the lessons in life.


So while I am down here, I can also say I am looking for oysters.  Looking for the pearls of wisdom that only come through the healing process after acknowledging pain.



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