I am a proud mama bear tonight.  Football is not really my cup of tea.  But with two sons, I guess it is inevitable that it was going to feature in my life at some point.  And today, it was really enjoyable, with the majority of Yorkshire ‘society’ on the sidelines, the boys all gave us good matches to watch.

 

I am currently loving this phase of their life…. Their characters are beginning to form around their strengths and what they enjoy doing.  They stay similar and yet so different.  One tinkling on a piano, one with his nose in a book.  One arty, one mathematical.  I am loving seeing their confidence grow but at the same time, allowing their vulnerability to be seen.

 

I find it fascinating how one minute they love each other, show concern for each other, laugh and play with exuberance… and the next be wrestling with vigour and intensity.

 

As I have done since they were tiny babies, I am never ready for the next phase, loving the one I am in… but also relishing their growth, in size but also in personality.  I would love to freeze frame time and one day come back to this one in particular…

 

Perhaps I write today about the boys, as I had to think about updating our Will in the event that anything should happen to us both and they are left orphaned.  I hate that idea. Hate it.  I want to be there all through their lives, but I know plans need to be made.  And in some way, having a plan to know they will be well loved is reassuring.

 

It was also reassuring to hear Christiane Northrup’s ideas on life after death and reincarnation;  how souls are lined up to choose their body on earth;  how souls come back time after time to live through a new bodily life, reliving through the same experiences, hardships until they learn the lesson, grow from the experience; how souls never really die, that they just leave their chosen body, only to come back again and usually surrounding themselves with the same souls.

 

She calls it the bigger picture.  And how the idea of mind, body and particularly belief in the reincarnation of the soul can help people with grief, hardship and difficulty.  Knowing that they will meet their loved one again or that they will get their chance again to conquer a challenge they just cannot defeat.

 

I think I would like to believe that.  I have a wild imagination. But it might take a while.  So in the meantime, I will stick with Wills and living every day to the full, embracing life and in particular with those beautiful souled boys of mine.